How to Stay Motivated
This is advice on how to stay committed to your goals and make progress, even when it’s hard.
So you wish you were more motivated?
That means you wish you had a desire to be willing to do something that you “have” to do or think you “should” do, right?
It can also mean you wish you had a willingness to do something you really do want to do, but maybe obstacles are standing in your way so it’s not as easy as you wish it was to do the thing.
In this blog, we’ll explore the external and internal factors that make up the feeling of motivation, so you can get more of those, and we’ll also go over tangible, practical ways to stay motivated.
Remember, these are my ideas based on my own experience and the experience of my clients. Take what resonates with you and leave the rest.
However, if the advice here doesn’t resonate, or even if it resonates but just isn't working, it may be beneficial to first do inner healing work to set the foundation so that motivation is even accessible.
If you’re truly ready to get and stay motivated, here are the topics:
From a practical perspective, the feeling of being motivated has two components. If you’re motivated, you have a desire AND a willingness to take action to do something.
If you find yourself lacking desire and willingness, or maybe just desire, start by doing some foundational inner work instead to gain clarity on whether you need to shift your mindset or goals rather than fix your motivation factor. If your goals aren’t aligned, why would you ever feel motivation to do them? In other words, aligned goals are important. Reconnecting to who you truly are can help you set aligned goals.
Oftentimes though, the desire can be there but the willingness or capacity to take action isn’t. And that’s okay! Just being can have just as much value as taking action. Balancing the two is completely healthy. But if you want to get over the slump and find ways to take action, figuring out what drives you is a great place to start.
How do you figure out what drives you?
It could be any number of things. Maybe you get up in the morning and keep going to work because you want or need money. So money’s your driver to get up in the morning. You get out of bed and get dressed in nice clothes because you want to look good and feel attractive, so external approval or maybe a boost of internal self esteem could be your driver.
The specifics of your driver or drivers can all change over the years, months, weeks, and even from day to day.
(And absolutely no judgement here at all, but if your driver is coming from outside of you, I’d want you to shift your focus more inward over time to care more about yourself and less about what other people think of you. That’s a topic for another day, however.)
If we do some digging, at the very core of your driver—the root of all of it—is hope. At least that’s what I see in my clients and in myself.
We believe that something good, like love, happiness, and connection, will come in life.
And the specific thing you define as your driver is a thing that represents hope to you in some way. Think about it.
What gives you hope?
Is it feeling good because you receive the outcome you wanted? Maybe, maybe not.
To know what gives you hope, let’s ask: what is hope? How do you know when you’re feeling hope?
Hope drives motivation and motivation drives change. Hope is a form of faith in the future. When you have hope, you’re more likely to take action for change. Taking action in turn builds more hope. If you’re acting, even if every action isn’t perfect and doesn’t get the best result, some actions will help you make progress. And that means there can still be hope.
This positive cycle is the very framework I work from when I’m supporting others in healing.
To identify your driver, you must identify the thing or things that give you hope. And then you can even go so far as to analyze what you’re hoping for and why those things give you hope.
Sometimes you just feel hope. But if you don’t, it’s a feeling you can actually create. Yes. You. Can.
Four of my favorite ways to maintain hope include:
Problem solving, uplifting stories, giving back, and daydreaming.
Let’s dive into these a bit.
Problem Solving
This is taking action toward solving a problem that contributes to your healing or improves a negative area of your life to drive hope. If you’re problem solving, you’re acting, and if you’re acting, there’s progress (even if it’s only in the form of a lesson), and if there’s progress, there’s hope.
Uplifting Stories
Read, watch, or listen to stories that restore your faith in humanity. When you see a story about someone rescuing an animal from being abandoned, for example, you know that yes, there was someone who abandoned the animal for whatever reason, but you also know there is someone who stepped in to help. That’s inspiring. Or when you hear of someone who’s thriving after abuse, it’s inspiring. It shows that you can do hard things too and be happy.
Giving Back
Giving back, helping other people, and personally seeing other people succeed also gives you faith in yourself and in the future of humanity.
Daydreaming
Start daydreaming and visualize the life you want and the specific circumstances you want. Just get lost in your dreams. If you can dream it, it can be reality, because every bit of our reality in existence now first started as a thought in somebody’s mind (or heart). Why should it not be your mind (or heart)? That gives hope.
What other ways can you think of to add more hope to your life?
I use these strategies and tools in my own life and so do my clients, so I know they can work. If you’re not sure what would work for you, try out an option that seems appealing. Have patience. And, keep in mind that trial and error or a combination of strategies might be your best way forward. Also remember that you’re not a machine, so it’s normal for motivation to ebb and flow and you don’t have to go 100 mph at all times to be valuable. You’re valuable just as you are!
Remember your role as a bridge for others to heal
Just as hurting people hurt people, healed people heal people. You may not actively go out and be a doctor or an energy healer, but just by existing in a state of health and wellbeing, you’ll inspire others to take steps to their own healing and wellbeing.
Keep that in mind—the impact of your actions not only change your life but reach much further than you can see or imagine.
The ripple is real.
Rely On Your Support System
You can rely on your support system when you feel discouraged, whether friends, family, or even therapists and life coaches or Facebook groups. We are social beings (even if you’re super introverted) and thrive in safe relationship.
Keep Track of Your Progress
This is a really cool way to stay motivated because it helps you remember how far you’ve come. To do this, start journaling for 5-10 minutes everyday, every week, or every month—whatever works for you. Make note of where you started and where you ended for that time period and that will help you see patterns of growth. Seeing growth and being reminded of it tells you that you’re capable, you’ve done it before, and you can do more.
Practice Gratitude Daily
A gratitude practice could look like journaling, speaking aloud, or simply thinking about things you’re thankful for. My favorite way to do this, especially when life feels hard, is to try to see the opportunity in the challenge rather than what’s happening or happened to you.
This will help you make meaning of your experiences and cultivate real gratitude (not the toxic kind that tries to avoid all negativity—more on that another day.) Finding real gratitude brings peace. Making meaning of your experiences helps you find your purpose, and finding your purpose and then living it is an ultimate healer.
Share Your Results With Others
Share your results along your journey in whatever way you see fit, whether that’s through social media; whether that’s talking to your best friend or your mom or your dad. You wouldn’t do this to brag, but to receive encouragement, feedback, and inspire others in your sphere of influence to pursue whatever it is that would light them up.
Even if you can’t see that influence that you have when you share, your example is part of how you’re a bridge for others to cross so they can heal as well—and can start a ripple you can’t even imagine.
Keep a Journey Mindset
I also want you to keep a journey mindset. Never believe you’re at the destination because life really is a constant journey. Your true purpose lies within the process. The moment you believe you’ve reached your destination, you may become unmotivated to learn more, expand, and keep growing. Now, there is a difference between growing because you’re afraid of the consequences if you don’t and growing because you truly want to. And, just because you want to grow doesn’t mean you can’t accept yourself as you are in this very moment. A journey mindset includes a healthy dose of self acceptance AND growth combined with trust in the process.
Laugh Often
Play and have fun! It really is okay to play and have fun, even if there’s suffering in the world. Yes, even if there’s suffering in the world. This reminds you of the joy in life. If you’ve suffered, joy can be seen as a rebellious act. If you laugh and raise your spirits, the things keeping you down lose power. Even if just a little at a time.
Use Practical Systems to Support Progress
It helps to set up systems for progress, such as scheduling time to work toward your goals, being able to check items off a list, or regularly rewarding yourself for achieving a goal, for example. Systems can help you remain consistent in your actions, even when you’re not motivated. This helps you keep momentum going, which in turn, provides more fuel for motivation.
Which strategy do you want to try first?
Questions or Comments?
Feel free to let me know if you have any questions in the comments, or you can schedule a free consultation.
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Hey there!
I’m Brandi Fleck, TICC. I’m a private practice, certified trauma-informed life coach and trauma recovery coach. All genders, sexualities, and races are welcome here. I primarily serve clients via one-on-one coaching and self-paced trauma education.
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